Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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