Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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