puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
