I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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