It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
