he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize