I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
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