if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize