Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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