i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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