i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
