Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Randomize