Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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