I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize