I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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