508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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