End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
