Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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