so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
