FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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