Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
too bad you live with your parents still
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
