that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
