Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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