4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
