is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Come see our sink grown plant.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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