she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize