***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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