i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
