Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.