My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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