How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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