So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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