I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
so much tequila, so little girl.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
