Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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