How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
