apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
one might say we're banned from that church
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He's a Shit stain on my heart
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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