piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
This is classic penis vs brain.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
