I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize