6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
