Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
