what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
only you would photoshop your dick
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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