Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
