Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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