Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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