D3 body, D1 cock
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
