pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
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No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
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You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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