Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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