And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
