I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
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