So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
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I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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