But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I did not marry a roomba.
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